Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
