Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
