Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Sacagawea was the original milf.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize
