Will you blow on my dice?
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
