My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize
