Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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