Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
