I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
