k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
