Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
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