I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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