When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
