Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
