Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
