Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
Welp...herpes.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
