Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
