I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
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