Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
