We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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