can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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