The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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