NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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