I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Randomize
