Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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