I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
