You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Randomize