I wanna bring you to show and tell
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Randomize
