He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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