Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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