You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
