I think scott just propositioned me for sex
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Randomize
