I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Randomize
