Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
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