I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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