"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
