This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Randomize
