She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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