he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Randomize
