so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize