So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
You were trust falling into bushes
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
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