this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Randomize
