Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize
