it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
now i know why i became what i already was.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Let's get the cat blown out
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
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