I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
