the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
