Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
foreskin is a definite game changer
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
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