I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
I cockslap morals
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
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