Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Randomize
