shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I want to stick my p in your. b.
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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