remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
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